Our first child was born in 2004. We were among the first in our circle of friends to have children, but from what little I'd experienced with friends, I knew I wanted something different. My husband is in the military and the births I'd seen in our local MTF (military treatment facility) were very medicalized and actually frightened me. It made me think birth was traumatic or a horrible accident just waiting to happen and you were lucky to have an OB rescue you and your baby from a horrible birth. Before we even became truly active in our maternity care, we were notified that our MTF was full and we were given a list of alternatives to choose from. As soon as I saw a birth center on the list, I knew that was where we wanted to be. We sought out a Bradley class and devoured every book, watched every DVD and talked to anyone we could about how to achieve a peaceful, non-frightening birth. Both my husband and I felt very well informed and empowered and we really liked the 3 midwives who rotated at our birth center. The closer our due date came, the more fear I anticipated, but it never came. I didn't expect that even with all the work we'd done!
The week before our son was due, I woke up thinking, "I need to get my Christmas shopping done." It was exactly a week before Thanksgiving and my shopping is ALWAYS done by then, but today, there was a sense of urgency to knock it all out. I left the house around 10 that morning and hit the mall. Around 1:30, I started to get tired, crampy, and my back hurt, but I figured it was from not eating lunch and walking around for almost 4 hours. I stopped at the food court, but ate very little of what I ordered at Wendy's. I shopped until about 4, and then went home. When I got there, my back was just about throbbing, but I thought, "Can't stop now! I still gotta wrap this stuff!" I sat in the middle of the floor and spread the day's purchases out before me with gift wrap, tape, and bows all over the place. My husband got home around 5:30 and I was miserable. My legs ached, my hips hurt, and my back was still throbbing fiercely. I took my husband's suggestion and got into the shower. He sat and talked to me, and after what seemed like just a few minutes he said, "You do realize you're pausing every 3 minutes, right?" I'm doing WHAT?! Once he drew my attention to it, there was no denying I was having contractions. At that point, he asked me what I'd eaten and when I told him I had no appetite, he left to make me some macaroni and cheese.
I got out a few contractions later and ate a small bowl of macaroni and cheese. After I ate, I got into bed and he sat behind me, applying counter pressure and moving the heated rice sock around to help keep me as comfortable as possible. Around 7, my oh-so-attentive husband got uncomfortable and thought we should call the midwives. I don't recall much about that conversation, but I remember seeing his face drain of color and ask something along the lines of, "NOW?! RIGHT NOW?!" I also know I spoke to the midwife on call, but I have no idea what was asked of me or how I responded.
The next thing I know, we're slowly making our way down the stairs of our apartment and my husband is gently helping me into the car. I was around 7-ish PM by then. Though we lived 20 minutes away from the birth center, being in the car was agonizing! I felt like the contractions never stopped and every little bump in the road made me want to shriek. We finally arrived at the birth center around 7:30-ish. We walked into our birth suite to find a perfectly filled tub, and our midwife. It was like Heaven on earth just to get out of the car, but walking into the soft lighting and feeling so instantly calmed was absolutely incredible.
I asked if I could get into the tub, and the midwife assured me I could after she examined me. I was 8-9 centimeters!!! My husband and I were in shock! I got into the tub and while it helped make contractions more bearable, it also stepped them up!
The next thing I knew, we were getting out, ready to push. Our champion of a son was having some decelerations in his heart rate, and being out of the tub made monitoring easier. Once I got into the bed, it seemed like I could not get comfortable. I wouldn't actually say I was in pain, but it was definitely the most uncomfortable I have ever been in my entire life (up to that point!). Once pushing started, our little guy seemed to like his situation even less. We tried several different positions to take the pressure off his cord, but we couldn't seem to find a position that worked and made him comfortable. It had only been about 35 minutes when the midwife explained to me that either he had to be born in the next 2-3 contractions, or they were going to have to help him out - either surgically, or with the vacuum. The way she said it must have given me a second wind because within the next 2 contractions, we had a son! It was a truly awesome. The midwife couldn't unloop his cord, so she had to cut it right away, but he wasn't even blue! He pinked quite nicely up almost immediately. He didn't cry, but he was very alert when he was handed to me just seconds after he was born. It didn't take long for the room to settle down and we were left to get to know our new son. Our birth and postpartum period were treated with such dignity and respect that I felt as though it had been as profound an experience for our birth team as it had been for us. I never felt like we were part of a machine, or just their daily routine. It was life-changing for us, and I am so thankful to have had that birth experience.
We had a 5 pound, 6 ounce bouncing baby boy, born at 39 weeks gestation. He came so fast and with so much power - like a tiny hurricane - that I don't think I ever had a moment to panic. Even when the midwife mentioned helping him out, it was more like going from, "This could take a while," to "How about having a baby... NOW?" I never felt out of control or pushed aside. I felt as though we were all listened to and respected. That alone made it so much easier to give birth!
Submitted by Heather
